Are you feeling sad and need a dose of laughter? It does wonders for my mind and can do the same for funny quotes. Funny quotes you will laugh. Laughing releases endorphins, which are natural substances in your body that can help to reduce stress and influence you to feel good. Below are some of my all time favorite funny quotes from famous people that never cease to make me laugh.
Funny Quote #1
By Patrick Moore. “There is absolutely nothing to be said for growing old in grace. It must be against the law.”
Funny Quote #2
By George Burns. “Actually, it only took one drink to get me loaded. It’s annoying, I can’t remember if it was the thirteenth or the fourteenth.”
Funny Quote #3
Stephen Martin a. “There is one thing that I will dissolve and that is if I am caught with another. I do not want to stand for it.”
Funny Quote #4
At Christopher Rock. You know the world is crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best shooter is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America’s Cup< /a>, France feigns America’s arrogance, Germany does not want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named ‘Bush’, ‘Dick and Colony.
Funny Quote #5
By Julio Iglesias. “When I came here, I couldn’t speak a word of English, but my sex life was perfect. Now my English is perfect, but my sex life is rubbish.”
Funny Quote #6
By Leo Rosenberg. “First you forget names, then you forget faces, then you forget to pull the zipper up, then you forget to pull the zipper down.”
Funny Quote #7
At Mark’s Twin. “Last week I stated that this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been seen by my sister, and now I wish to withdraw from this opinion.”
Funny Quote #8
by Zsa Zsa Gabor Personally, I don’t know anything about sex, because I’ve always been married.”
Funny Quote #9
By King Stephen. “Some say I must be terrible, but that’s not true. I have the heart of a little boy in a vase on my desk.”
Funny Quote #10
By Phyllis Diller. “We spend the first twelve months of our children teaching them to walk and talk, and then the next twelve, telling them to sit and cuddle.”
Funny Quote #11
With Marilyn Monroe. “A wise girl kisses but does not love, listens but does not believe, and leaves before she leaves.”
Funny Quote #12
By Frank Lloyd Wright. “A doctor can bury mistakes, but an architect can remind his clients to plant vines.”
Funny Quote #13
by Sharon Stone. “Women can fake orgasms. But men can fake an entire relationship.”
Funny Quote #14
By Dave Barry. Women often ask, ‘what do men really want, deep down in their hearts?’ The best answer, derived from a deeper analysis of the complex and subtle interplay of thought, instinct, and emotion that constitutes the male psyche, is that men, deep in their hearts, want men to “crawl”to look at me. .
Funny Quote #15
By Bob Marley. “Humor helps us to think out of the box. The average child laughs about 400 times a day, the average adult laughs only 15 times a day. Why does someone else laugh 385 times?”
Help keep your mind happy by reading quotes like these everyday. You have fifteen to begin when you are, 385 and as usual you keep the boys laughing all day long.
Recommended Readings:
Friendship Quotes
12 Marriage Quotes
