For shy people, it’s more than just painful feelings in social situations that can cause paralysis. There is also rumination that takes place in their minds about what they desire, and the more confident people who go out there suffer from envy while living it, while the shy person remains isolated in an imaginary shell.
Typically, shy people focus too much on themselves, while a confident person can focus more on the situation at hand. I remember avoiding myself so bitterly as a kid that in social situations I sometimes felt like I was experiencing an out-of-body experience, looking at myself from a different perspective, harshly judging myself about how pathetic, weak, and awkward I was. I also explained everything about myself; He boasted of every imagined and fabricated vice to the highest degree. Of course, this stress clouded the mind, shortness of breath, and caused me to say the most stupid, most stupid thing. imaginable events in what I perceived to be a crucial “make or break” social situation. Rather than blinding my eyes with the fear of a headache, I found it easier to strike an opportunity of social advancement, which made my mind so much worse in thoughts than my pitiful shame was, and in which I was supposed to be wanting. It is the best year of my life. But I am not clumsy or out of sorts; Anxiety and shame kept me from showing my true self.
The first method for overcoming shyness is learning the art of relaxation.
In therapy sessions, which included both hypnosis therapy and psychotherapy, I learned that shyness is related to anxiety and social condition. If you can relax, the focus can shift away from you and your analysis, and then you gain the mental flexibility to practice social and conversational skills. You can achieve this relaxed state by recalling the times when you felt spontaneous and care-free when you were around people too close. Even severely nervous people, like myself, family and some relatives were seriously worried that they didn’t look around. With this awareness, you know that you can be in a relaxed state around the person. So it’s just important to transfer that state of mind to things with people you don’t know by recognizing that it’s simple that you’re another person, physiologically no different than your friend, parent or sibling. around
Focus not on yourself, but on others.
Instead of mentally trying to read how the other person perceives you, forget about yourself and act as an observer and judge of others. Confident people don’t consider their self esteem a problem, so why? No matter what happens, no matter what you are and how you move, it will not kill you, no matter how foolish you act, and no news will be spread in the night.
Focus on what other people are doing in social and will be curious where they live, or how they live and hear their conversations and names they call you back by remembering well. This will help you to achieve the material of the conversation and relieve your anxiety at the same time.
When you talk to people, ask open-ended questions.
Most people love talking about themselves, and you don’t have to worry about impressing people with your speaking skills too much. It is enough for those who are genuinely interested in themselves to feel important, as you do, and they will carry on the conversation. You can ask them questions that involve specifics such as “what do you like about this town” or “what else interests you”. Then start expressing your thoughts.
Ignore the imaginary veil.
Typically, mental imagery is not a reliable radar because it will explain the events. I can’t think of too many concerts, parties, or sporting events that I’ve been to for the first time, where the event matched what my imagination predicted would be like. Boxing people, thinking what others think can be the true confidence of a killer. You need to stop thinking what they may or may not be thinking – it’s a painful exercise, and what they think of you is not an accurate description of who you are, but rather a representative of their characteristics and personality.
It was all or nothing thinking.
Nothing is ever black or white in life, which is especially true socially. It’s also a roller coaster ride and an anxious attitude of those who think like, “this is perfect. shame or “make me laugh” Whether it’s injury, failure, or anything else that’s labeled between the two extremes, it’s always common to be depressed, angry, and anxious. or your experience.Neutral thinking is just looking at things and just “being what they are” without much arbitrary meaning can eliminate much of your anxiety.
Finally, don’t let anyone tell you that you were born shy, or that you’re going to accept it. It doesn’t have to be part of you and not normal. Humans are naturally social creatures. Shame is overcome. You can train your mind to think in any way you want. I’m living proof – my shyness overcame and I became so exited at first that I was a little overwhelmed.
Relaxed company is one of the greatest feelings you can have, anyone can achieve it if you learn the art of relaxation that frees you to truly be yourself.
