Stupid Bible He has dozens and dozens of records of completely ridiculous events that never happened. For proof that the Bible is nonsense, consider the story of Samson. The silly story of Samson should have you scratching your head in no time if you believe the Bible is the infallible word of God. I also thought that I should not throw stones. Wait, that’s another stupid story. Let us return to Samson.
The story of Samson and his great strength is taught in Sunday across the country. The problem is that Samson’s story, carefully reviewed logically, is completely ridiculous. In fact, one of the stories in the Bible is the exile.
Beware of Lions!
In the first example, Samson killed the lion, Judg. Does he use a spear? No. does he use the net? No. So what does Samson use? He uses his bare hands. No, “the lion tore one of the goats.”
The silly story admits that the lion was young, but the lion was old enough for the present threat because the Spirit of the Lord came upon Samson “mighty” to accomplish this heroic deed. Now, therefore, the diligent reader must inquire whether this word of God is infallible, or a foolish fable, which, though fictitious, is intended to express a genius, exciting it?
Give me a second to pick up this mouth!
Consider the other exploits of the great Samson. Samson is attacked by the army of the Philistines, who proceed to bind him. Samson breaks the ropes, grabs the jaw of the donkey and kills a thousand men. See Judges 15:12-16. I don’t do this. This is a silly story in the Bible. Samson kills a thousand men!
Visualize this for a moment. It’s hard for me not to think of one of the old kung-fu movies where the hero is surrounded. the bad guys come at him one by one for a way to crush him here. Well, Samson and that silly story, multiply that kung-fu mission by about a hundred. So far the Bible has told us that Samson tore the lion with his two bare hands and killed a thousand men to the bone. Wait, get better and be stupider.
Bringing home!
Samson best saves the story for last! Judge 16, 25-31, he was caught, a spindle of beans around a man’s hair (I will only talk about this briefly below). In the Temple of Dagon, blinded and bound, surrounded by soldiers, he prays for the destruction of the enemy’s forces.
Samson literally finds only two pillars that apparently support the temple and brings down the entire building with his bare hands, killing thousands in the process. I’m not doing this again. Read it. A man uses his bare hands to bring down a huge building. How can this be viewed as anything other than a stupid story to inspire the masses?
Throw the puppies
I will scarcely speak of the source of Samson’s strength, and of his long hair. This biblical story is as silly as a kitten kicking an insect. It would be easy to do, but I didn’t want to have fun in the process.
Looking back, I can’t figure out why I believe funny stories like Samson’s greatest story of my life. The Bible is full of silly stories like this, and I wonder why I chose to ignore the obvious for three decades. Samson was not true. Samson did not do impossible feats. The legend of Samson was created by men wanting to inspire and anger the people to follow the decrees of their God. They just liked making silly stories.
