I am all for consistency, but sometimes you need to keep your kids on their toes. Creative discipline is called for in order to help make the punishment fit the crime so to speak. It is also good to change it up so that your child is not weighing the consequences and deciding that sitting in time-out is worth whacking his sister!
Alternatives to time-outs
- Time-in as an alternative to time-outs. This is effective when boredom seems to be the culprit to bad behavior. Send your child to a specific area to complete a task. Be sure the activity has a specific beginning and end so that once they are done, they can get up. Ideas include tracing the alphabet or stringing beads on yarn. The idea is to give them a tedious job to do rather than simply sitting. The focused attention needed often relaxes a child.
- Adjust bedtimes. Instead of giving a time-out, move their bedtime up by the amount of time they would have been sitting. A 9 o’clock bedtime that becomes an 8:30 bedtime is often more effective in changing behavior.
- Roll the dice. An interesting way to handle discipline is to leave it up to fate. Write a variety of consequences on small slips of paper and then place in a “Correction Can.” Instead of sending your child to time-out, have them choose a consequence from the can. Ideas include an earlier bedtime, specific chores, no TV for the rest of the day or no computer time. Keep it interesting by throwing in a blank piece of paper. If your child pulls this piece, they are given mercy.
Solutions for temper tantrums
- Send outside. If your child is throwing a temper tantrum, tell them they can continue in the backyard. Tell them when they are finished, they can come back inside.
- Set a timer. If your child is crying over something, set a timer and tell them to keep it up for ten minutes.
- Video tape the episode. Now this won’t work on all kids, but some will be quickly deterred if they know you are videotaping their antics to send to grandma.
Solutions for lazy work
- Set a timer. Give kids 15 minutes to have a job done and they are suddenly working against time, not the job itself. My daughter tends to get easily distracted without the timer, but she loves to see how quickly she can get a job done with it.
- Do it again. A very effective way to correct kids who try to get away with the very least amount of effort is to make them do the job again, and again, and again. Whether it is sweeping the floors or putting dishes in the dishwasher, they will quickly learn that it take a whole lot less effort to do it right the first time than to stand there and redo the job two, three, or four times in a row.
- Make it count. I read about a great solution for lazy work regarding cleaning up after dogs. The child was supposed to pick up all the piles in the backyard, but was just not giving it any sort of good effort. In order to change this mindset of doing the least possible amount of work, his dad made him run barefoot in the backyard after the job was done. Make their work count.
More by Sylvie Branch:
Take a bite out of bad behavior: 5 ways to stop biting in its tracks
Bilingual kids are better multitaskers and more
4 Ways to Bring Music into Your Family Life This Summer
