Excuse me for being a little egotistical here, but this was one of the many articles I was born to write. Anyone who knows me personally knows that I am a maniac when it comes to karaoke. It can be a fun way to spend an evening, making a fool out of yourself in front of your friends and strangers. At the same time, it is a chance for you to show people that you have the vocal pipes to sing the hell out of a song. For the most part, karaoke can be very cringe inducing to watch and experience. You have people singing your favorite songs horribly, hence destroying what you liked about them in the first place, and then you have those who catch your attention in a way that no one else can. No matter which karaoke bar you go to in the world, you never know what kind of singer you are going to get next (unless you know everyone there).
For me, I treat karaoke like it is performance art. I am interested in taking a song I know the lyrics to backwards and forwards, and make it my own. My goal is to get the attention of those who are usually too wrapped up in their onion rings and domestic beer to bother to listen to anyone on stage. I want to hold the audience at attention and give them something that will not be easily forgotten. I also want to take whatever anxieties and frustrations are on my mind and get them out of my damn system for good. This has given people a lot of entertainment, and it has also scared the living crap out of many who were there to witness my singing in a mentally unhinged state (whether they knew me personally or not is beside the point). It even got to where the owner of a pizza place I frequented with my junior college friends came out to make a special announcement:
“I was going to announce this earlier tonight, but I’m gonna go ahead and do it now. I got this notice in, and it says that according to the Surgeon General’s warning, Ben may be hazardous to your health!”
Yup, that’s the reputation I have, and I have managed to take it all over Northern and Southern California. You have been warned! So, the list of the top ten songs to sing for karaoke will be a reflection of songs I have sang in the past, and of how they stand out as the best to sing. Whether or not you can top what I did with them is a discussion we can have at another time. I present these in no particular order as each song has been a crazy joy to sing, and each was preceded by that nervousness of performing that follows me wherever I go to do this.
So! On with the list!
1) “Jessie’s Girl” by Rick Springfield
This is probably Springfield’s most well known song out of all the ones he has ever done in the 80’s, 90’s, or the first decade of the new century. It also reflects my undying love and enjoyment of 80’s music. The song deals with a situation in life that we guys know all too well; There’s that girl we want to be with, and she is involved with someone else. Even worse, she is involved with your best friend. You feel bad enough as it is, and now on top of that, you get all resentful about it. This is a great song for anyone to sing who is dealing with a constant bout of sexual frustration, or for anyone endlessly reminded of what a crush on someone really means.
I sang this once at The Brass Monkey in Los Angeles, and I ended up treating it as an exorcism of sorts as I screamed out:
“AND HE’S WATCHING HER WITH THOSE EYES!!!! AND SHE’S LOVING HIM WITH THAT BODY I F***KING KNOW IT!!! AND SHE’S HOLDING HIM IN HIS ARMS LATE LATE AT NIGHT!!! YOU KNOW I F***KING SHOULD HAVE JESSIE’S GIRL!!!!!!!!!!”
Suffice to say, the women I am most interested in are usually involved with someone else or just don’t swing my way. This song gives me the golden opportunity to vent my pain and entertain you all in the process. Some of you will be laughing hysterically in the process, others will be watching with their eyes wide open, wondering if I have gone off some type of medication like lithium or valium.
2) “Who Can It Be Now?” by Men At Work
Ahh, Men At Work! Gone but not forgotten! This song by them was actually the very first song I ever sang at any karaoke place, and singing it is kind of like telling a story more than anything else. This is the kind of song that you should act out more than sing, and knowing the lyrics as well as I do, it gives me a chance to dance around the stage like a white guy who is under the misplaced impression that he is actually cool and a really good dancer. Playing the obliviousness of the white guy who is almost completely immune to the eye rolling that he doesn’t see going on in the audience is always a blast for me to play. It reflects all the kids I know when they were Freshman at my high school. They walked around the campus like they were the toughest little things we ever saw, unawares that their egos were on the verge of being completely shattered.
A great song dealing with isolation and paranoia, it was accompanied by a very funny music video which reminded us all that just because we are paranoid doesn’t mean they’re not out to get us.
3) “Dancing With Myself” by Billy Idol
Here’s another great 80’s song to go completely nuts over. My friends from junior college wanted to see me do this song again, and they have never asked me to do that for any other song. On top of this song being so much to sing, it’s a song that has me dancing to the rhythm of it without me thinking about it. It’s also one of those songs that has me wishing I was wearing a wig while singing it. The video for the song has all those new wave punks moving all over the place with the hair moving along with them, and then we watched as they just jumped off that building while Billy Idol more or less electrocuted himself. This may very well be my favorite song by Idol as he sings about not giving a crap if anyone is watching him. Billy is out to have a fun time, even if it’s by himself.
Actually, a funny thing happened when I sang this song at that pizza place I went to in Northern California. I have no hesitation in singing as loud as Billy sang in the song, but at one point I shrieked so loud that the song just stopped. Turns out I kind of overloaded the system through my crazy singing ways, and this had a stage manager I knew at the time on my case of not singing too loud. Otherwise, I would be paying the duo putting on the karaoke show for a new system to use.
The song did come back on eventually, but by then I was a little too afraid to sing to my fullest, so the song didn’t quite end the way it should have.
4) “Walk This Way” by Aerosmith (the Run DMC version)
I love the original version of this song, but when it comes to singing it at karaoke, the Run DMC version is the way to go. It succeeded in giving Aerosmith the comeback in the 80’s that they deserved, and it highlighted how the song always had the feel of a rap song in the first place. Also, if you really don’t have that great of a singing voice, this is the version to do because in the end, you really don’t have to sing it.
I remember singing this at a high school graduation party with a friend of mine. We both did the duet and exploded into the maniacs that we were when the main chorus of the song came around:
“WALK THIS WAY!!!!!! TALK THIS WAY!!!!!!!! WALK THIS WAY!!!!!!! TALK THIS WAY!!!!!!!!!”
The other guy ended up doing this hilarious Henry Rollins dance while I seemed to just make up my own choreography as I went along. I wish I could describe the dance I came up with, but you really had to have been there to truly appreciate it. It was the loosest I had been all year, and I really did need to loosen up in general!
5) “Like A Virgin” by Madonna
Ok ok ok! Don’t start telling me that this is just a girl’s song! Why limit yourself in the songs you sing just because of the gender of the singer? Chances are, you will be making a complete fool out of yourself, so don’t be afraid of holding back. Besides, what makes you think this song is exclusively for females anyway? Men can feel this way too, you know? Remember your first time you lost your virginity? This is a song that you can go absolutely wild on! You don’t have to sing it in exactly the same way Madonna did. Go wild! Make it sound like you’re having sex, and you can climax at the song’s end. People will look at you like you have gone completely loony, and some may be offended by what you have done, but that’s only because they don’t have the balls to do what you just did.
Seriously! Take a chance and be the first guy at your party to sing this one! People may look at you like you’re insane to sing it being a man, but you will inspire others to act more foolishly than you!
6) “One More Minute” by Weird Al Yankovic
This is one of those Weird Al songs that isn’t so much a parody of any specific song as it is on a particular style of song. With “One More Minute,” I think Weird Al is parodying the “doo wop” kind of song which deals with a breakup where one person is more than ready to move on. Weird Al sings of all the things he would do then go back to the woman who dumped him for someone else. Those things include eating shards of broken glass, cleaning the bathrooms of grand central station with his tongue, jumping into a swimming pool filled with double-edged razor blades, and getting a thousand paper cuts on his face among other things. It is safe to say that he is more than ready to move on to the next relationship.
The great thing about doing this song is that you don’t even have to try and be funny. The ridiculously insane imagery that comes out of the lyrics more than does the work for you. I did this song at a party for the company I currently work with, and nobody ever looked at me in the same way ever again. The following week, people were still congratulating me on the performance I gave and still laughing like crazy over. You have to love it when you have that kind of effect on those who are not able to forget what you did the previous week. That way, you know that you have made a most memorable impact on them!
7) “Yakety Yak” by The Coasters
Here’s a classic from the 50’s that innocently captures parents commanding their children to do their chores immediately. It’s a very innocent song… That is, till I start singing it. The way I see it, it’s all about a parent who is on their last nerves because their kid is lazy. Remember putting off all the things you needed to do around the house on a regular basis? Don’t even pretend that your mom and dad never grounded you more than once for your insubordination!
This song is great for everyone to sing, but I am recommending especially for all the moms and dads out there who had to put up with kids like me. Singing this song is a great way to vent your frustrations without ever having to resort to curse words (assuming that offends you). Kids can sing it as well and use the opportunity to mimic their parents, assuming of course they are not around to watch.
What is a yakety yak anyway? Is that a name you call someone? An insult that cuts deep at some and just flat out bewilders others? I can almost see someone saying:
“GET OUTTTA MY FACE YOU YAKETY YAK!! AND DON’T TALK BACK!!”
I did this one while I was at UC Irvine, and I think it is safe to say that I showed everyone how karaoke is really done.
8) “Hello Muddah, Hello Faddah” by Alan Sherman
This is a cute little song that is fun to throw into the mix of things. Usually, I see people singing rock and roll songs or cheesy power ballads, so this song is great to shake things up a little. No one ever sees it coming. A hilarious song about the most ironic letter a kid send his parents from summer camp, it’s another song that no one will ever see coming. Because of that, you may very well be the most memorable performer of the evening. The following week, you will still be on everyone’s minds!
This is another song where you don’t have to try and be funny. The lyrics are inspired enough to do all that for you, and the more you play it straight, the funnier it will be.
I did this song at a Japanese restaurant in Walnut Creek years ago, and I ended up adding a little something to the lyrics at one point:
“I will even let Aunt Bertha hug and kiss me. BLEEEEEEEH!!!!!!!!!!!!”
9) “It’s Still Rock & Roll To Me” by Billy Joel
One of my favorite songs of Billy Joel, I gave it a little schizophrenic twist when I performed at Sardis Restaurant in Burbank:
“What’s the matter with the clothes I’m wearing?
CAN’T YOU TELL THAT YOUR TIE’S TOO WIDE??!!!
Maybe I should buy some old tab colors?
WELCOME BACK TO THE AGE OF JIVE!!!
This is a great song in how Joel describes how all the new styles are always variations on the same old thing. Indeed, the more things change, the more they stay the same. As a result, this remains one of Billy Joel’s most timeless songs. Not laughable or cheesy in any sense, it holds up and is sure to get the crowd entertained in no time.
10) “Daniel” by Elton John
This song has remained with me ever since I first heard it at the age of 3. This was long before most of Elton’s music became utterly bombastic and before his songs ended up all sounding the same. I know a lot of people like to sing like they’re Christina Aguilera (no offense to her) and show us how amazingly flexible their voices are, but this song can just be sung without going into some incredible histrionics, and it is more beautiful and memorable that way. The way I see it, the simpler a song like this, the more powerful and memorable it will come across to those listening. Heck, even the drunk guys drinking their ninth bottle of Corona will be watching you in total silence. If you come off good enough, you might even hear a pin drop in the room.
This was the last song that I ever sang at that pizza joint I kept going to with my junior college compadres. I guess after freaking everyone out with my acts on insanity with a microphone, I wanted to go out of there having proven to people that I actually had a good voice and could sing. At the song’s end, I was greeted with a standing ovation. I didn’t get one before, so I definitely succeeded with my swan song at this place.
After that, one of my friends tried to see if I could get a chance to sing “Dancing With Myself” again since they never got enough of that one. However, the restaurant was on the verge of closing up for the evening. But not to worry, there were many other karaoke venues to visit, and that song will be performed again by me someday.
