Have you have ever been in a bar, tavern or night club on a night where there is a “special” and wondered how they are making any money? Many establishments will resort to having various discounts on items during the week to attract business. You may find draft beer for a dollar or cheap buckets of beer, and it might seem like that is all that anyone is ordering. However, as the night goes on, it is inevitable that one group of more adventurous patrons will start a new trend by ordering shots. Having worked in and out of bars for the past five years, I can attest to the domino effect that follows. As soon as one group of girls steps up to the bar and takes a round of shots, the whole bar starts shooting. And that right there is your money maker.
Some bars can make all of the profits needed to cover their expenses for a night in the last, shot infused hours of operation. So if you are still worrying about the poor bar owner breaking even on “Two-Dollar-‘Tini-Tuesdays:” don’t. A more practical thing to worry about is what, exactly, you are drinking. Ask any guy standing at the bar, drink clutched in one hand and a crisp twenty in the other, waving around in the air, what his favorite ten shots are. Chances are pretty good that he will spout off at least a few shots that you have never heard of. Better still are the odds that you will hear the word “bomb” slipped in there once or twice.
I would venture to guess that, while you are gladly paying for your bar owner’s new ride, you should at least want to get the most bang for your buck. For some people, this is quite simple: a shot of something neat. There is nothing like straight, warm liquor to get your blood flowing. Yet, for others, getting your money’s worth out of a shot also involves a little bit of flavor. Now, before all of you guys start pointing the finger toward your lady friends and claim to hate downing “girly” drinks, be aware of a simple observation. Far and away, the vast majority of those who are purchasing these “not-nearly-manly-enough-for-me” shots are, in fact, guys.
So, whether you are buying these flavored bar shots because you like them or because you would just do anything to make sweetie happy (both are fine reasons. . .), I come bearing a list of the best. These are the tastiest, most potent bar shots that your taste buds will ever touch. In addition, these shots do not contain much (if any) caffeine and most have little sugar. This is a good thing because caffeine and sugar are the tag team duo that contributes most to your wanting to die when you wake up the next morning. Now, to the list: which, by the way, proceeds from tamest to tastiest.
10. Pineapple Upside Down Cake:
This shot starts off the bottom five for one simple reason: little potency. A generous bartender might make it a little sharper for you, but you can usually count on the flavor saving this shot. It tastes ridiculously like how it is supposed to.
Recipe: 1 part vanilla vodka, ½ part amaretto, ½ part pineapple juice. Shake w/ice, pour, and sink grenadine to the bottom of glasses.
If you do not like Hawaiian Punch, stop reading this list and go reconsider your youth. For everyone else, a shot that tastes exactly (and I mean exactly) like the fruity punch sounds sweet. And it is . . . which is also the problem. This one’s got a lot of sugar; be warned.
Recipe: 1 ¼ parts cherry vodka, ½ part peach schnapps, ¼ parts each: lime juice, pineapple juice and grenadine. Shake all ingredients together with ice.
8. Mint Chocolate Chip:
This one is self explanatory. It tastes, looks and feels like a mint chocolate chip milkshake. You might think that it doesn’t even have alcohol. Well, it does. And it makes use of the green crème de menthe, which is a nice touch.
Recipe: 1 part each: vanilla vodka, Irish crème liquor, and chocolate liquor. Add a one or two splashes of green crème de menthe. Shake with ice.
7. Hazel-Mocha Cappuccino:
This one tastes like everyone’s favorite coffee-like drink from everyone’s favorite coffee house. Rich and bold, it still manages to pack a decent punch. Watch out, however, as it makes use of espresso flavored vodka. Some of these contain caffeine.
Recipe: 1 part espresso vodka, ¼ parts each: Irish cream liquor, hazelnut liquor (Frangelico*), chocolate liquor, and coffee liquor (Kahlua). Shake with ice.
6. Tang:
If you don’t like Tang, then you probably also don’t like Hawaiian Punch and are no longer reading this. So that was unnecessary. Anyhow, the best part about Tang is the ruthless acidity that seemed to eat away your esophagus with each swig. That and the monkey commercials. The acidity is present in the shot; monkeys, however, are not.
Recipe: 1 part blackberry schnapps (Blackhaus), ¼ parts both blue curacao and orange juice. Shake blackberry schnapps and orange juice together with ice and pour. Sink blue curacao to bottom of glasses.
5. Superman:
Superman rounds off the top five. These are some seriously tasty, and potent, shots. And just in case you were wondering, yes: this is Superman the ice cream . . . the shot. Superman ice cream is the single most American thing ever. Forget apple pie and football with pads; my America is multi-colored ice cream that tastes like cotton candy and Fruit Loops. This shot can leap out of its glass and into your mouth in a single bound.
Recipe: 1 part each: Irish cream liquor, amaretto, blue curacao, and banana liquor. Shake with ice.
4. Apples & Oranges:
This is an interesting shot. For some reason, everyone that came to a bar that I used to work at constantly ordered this shot. So I tried it and discovered why: it tastes like fresh apples and oranges. Nice and tart, and it packs quite a punch.
Recipe: 1 part orange vodka, ¼ part sour apple schnapps, a splash of orange and cranberry juice. Shake with ice.
3. Snow Shoe:
My inclusion of a bourbon shot in this list may perplex some of you. For reasons that I will never understand, a lot of people just don’t like bourbon. Well, get over yourselves. The French have Champagne, the Germans have beer and the Scotch have . . . scotch. We have bourbon. Like Champagne, bourbon was originally only allowed to be produced in a specific region. In this case it was Bourbon County, Kentucky. Bourbon is sweet, carmely and delicious. It is also a key ingredient in a mint julep. I have included the snow shoe shot for this very basis. For some wonderful reason, mint and bourbon go oh-so harmoniously together. The notes from the mint cancel out the sharp burn of the bourbon (perhaps what some don’t like…) and produce a wonderfully smooth, chilling flavor. This shot is very close to replicating the magic of the official drink of the Kentucky Derby.
Recipe: 1 part fine bourbon whiskey, splash of peppermint schnapps (higher proof preferred). Shake together with ice.
2. Almond Joy:
Having this shot so high on the list baffles me, because I hate almonds and coconuts. However, the combination of the two with chocolate is delicious. This shot tastes exactly like those sweet little candy bars. In addition, there are no fillers in this shot. It is a magical mixture made simply from different liquors.
Recipe: equal parts each: Three Olives chocolate vodka, Frangelico, and coconut rum. Shake together with ice.
1. Cherry Tootsie Pop
How many licks does it get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? While the answer may be debatable, I can guarantee that you can get there with one shot. This shot finishes off the list because it is, quite simply, perfect. It is not purely alcohol-fueled: there are fillers. It even contains Red Bull. Don’t start doubting me. This shot can hold its own with the others on the list in terms of potency. However, what sets this shot apart is that it tastes exactly like a moment. Not just a flavor, but a moment. This shot captures the exact taste of the moment you bite through the candy shell and into to chocolate center of a Tootsie Pop. This is without a doubt the best tasting flavored bar shot I have ever had. Period.
Recipe: 1 part Three Olives chocolate vodka, ¼ part Red Bull, ¼ part grenadine. Shake all of the ingredients together (yes, that includes the Red Bull) with ice. The secret here is twofold. First, shaking the Red Bull removes the carbonation, which is not necessary. Secondly, the mixture of Red Bull and grenadine is the bartender’s tool for replicating the cherry candy flavor. For example, here’s a bonus. Try substituting the chocolate vodka with lemon flavored rum. The result tastes eerily similar to a certain bubble gum that comes packaged with a comic strip.
I hope that this list provides you with some solid choices to keep in mind for the next time you are out and turn to the dark world of shots. Remember, drinking flavored bar shots does not make you a wimp. It could just as easily mean you are whipped.
* None of the brands are mentioned for promotional reasons of any sort. Brand name liquors are only mentioned for one of two reasons. The first case is that they contain a higher proof (i.e. tastier shots). The other reason is that a particular brand has a taste that is essential for creating the shot mentioned. For example, Three Olives chocolate vodka has an entirely different taste than other brands. It is a crucial element to getting the tastes spot on.
