COMMENTARY | During Rihanna’s recent interview with Ryan Seacrest, she said her musical collaboration of “Birthday Cake” with Chris Brown was just “innocent.” No one can forget the altercation between Rihanna and Brown in 2009, with photos of Rihanna’s bruised face, leaked by TMZ, from being attacked. With media involvement, it raised awareness about domestic abuse and why women stick around after being abused.
After charges were pressed against Brown, Rihanna was held to a high standard among her fans and also became an icon to battered women. Women were able to relate to Rihanna because 25 percent of women have experienced a form of domestic abuse in their life, and only 27 percent of cases are reported to authorities.
Brown avoided jail time by pleading guilty of felonious assault. He received five years of probation, domestic violence classes, and 120 community service hours.
Fans are turning against Rihanna nearly three years after breaking the domestic abuse silence, with current rumors about recent hookups and music promotion with Brown. An outsider looking into the relationship between the two, or any other domestic violence case, would wonder why she would want to put herself through that abuse again.
Victims of abuse go back to their abusers an average of seven times before they leave for good, according to the Florida Keys Domestic Abuse Shelter. This pain pendulum comes from the mixed feelings of fear, guilt, shame, and forgiveness after leaving the relationship.
Brittney, an abuse victim I spoke with, knew about this pain from personal experience. “It was like I could never leave. I remember the very last time I ever let him hit me. … I was beat so bad, I fell into a corner and let him kick me in the ribs, while trying to curl myself up into a corner on the wall.”
She always hid her bruises very well with make-up and carefully placed fashion clothing and accessories. I hid the abuse from my friends and family for three years and I never pressed any charges. My mom just made him leave the house after she felt something was wrong with me after the last attack.”
Brittney said, “My mom saved my life that day. … I don’t even know if I have shared the experience with her.” Brittney’s husband knows about the years of abuse but they never talk about the past, since it is very hurtful to know about the abuse and having to relive it if it comes up in a conversation.
“Rihanna was my hero for coming out and raising awareness for domestic violence victims…now the only thing we can hope for is awareness for why women go back to their abusers,” said Brittney. Any publicity is good publicity, and this collaboration with Rihanna and Brown will hopefully kick domestic violence back into the media for public awareness, education, and prevention.
