One of the many truths of life is that the world doesn’t stop turning when you are feeling blue, stressed, or depressed. This case is especially true if you are a single mother. Depression, from the least to most extreme, generally makes us want to curl up in bed and just mope and sleep our problems away. But, when you are a single mother, especially of school aged children or younger, that is just not an option.
So, what do single mothers do to help combat depression in order to tend to their kids as well as deal with the symptoms of depression which often include, sadness, helplessness, tiredness, lack of motivation, and just an overwhelming feeling of wanting to say “I give up!”
One way a single mother who is depressed can help wash away the blues, aside from getting an anti-depressant medication, is to join support groups for single mothers. Speaking to other women with the same predicament may help you to better cope with your issues. Not only that, as harsh as it may sound, sometimes listening to other womens problems may help you realize that your problems pale in comparison to theirs. This may be just the kick in the pants to get you back up and running in Mommy-mode again.
Joining a church or other place of worship is another way to gain much needed support during these hard times. A good sermon can lift your spirits and while the kids are away in Sunday school, it gives you a chance to breathe without hearing “Mommmm, where are my shoes? Mommm, she hit me!! Mom, mom, mom, mommmm!” Plus, church is always free and most offer child care services. Think of going Sunday morning and evening and on Wednesday…that is 3 opportunities to be kid free for at least an hour. Let’s face it, some of us single mothers need those kid free times to recoop, and not all of us can afford a sitter or a spa treatment. Plus, getting some inspirational words from the preacher will help you as well.
If you are severely depressed, you may need to speak to your primary care physician. He may offer a referral to a counsellor or may give you a script for anti-depressants, you should not be ashamed to take these medications. Just do your homework and see waht the side effects are to certain medications. It may also be best to see how these medications will directly affect you before using them alone with yoru children around.
We all get depressed from time to time and that depresssion may seem worse to single mothers. Not only are they single, meaning they don’t have a constant companion to confide in, but they also have the weight of the world on their shoulders trying to figure out how to care and love their children during this depressing time without depressing the children. That is something you have to be very careful about. Your mommy, you can’t be laying around all day, feeling “whoa is me”, skipping out on cooking for the kids, bathing the kids, helping them wiht homework, etc.
If you feel you are getting depressed to the point where you have difficulity dealing with daily activities including activities with your children, you must seek outside help. If you don’t, this depression you have is going to snowball and your children will get swallowed up in the snowball causing more problems to occur.
If you don’t feel comfortable going to a place of worship, find an online community that is dealing with the same issues as you are, attend some sort of community activity that will help take your mind of the woes in your world. Most of these community activities provide child care, check first to see. You will be surprised how much better you will feel just by getting out of the house. Getting healthy amounts of sun and exercise will also help rid yourself of the blues.
Your children need you, all of you. It is okay to get sad sometimes, depressed even, but if your depression is getting to the point that you are not taking care of your children, i.e. nurturing them, then you have a major problem on your hands and you need to seek help as soon as possible before you have a depressed single mother and depressed children as well.
