Democratic Debate – What is Your Position on Global Warming?

Interviewer: Once again, our candidates for the next President of the United States share their thoughts on the most important event of the day. Now a report on a real hot topic: Global Warming. Here at WKBS (Where the B comes before the S) we want to know your position on Global Warming.
John Edwards: Our planet is melting. Look at the sweat that will come down from a recent $400 haircut. There must be something about it. That is why I propose reducing carbon emissions by 40% by 2050.
Barack Obama: I will see you 40% and raise you 10%. Hey, I tried to go all the way. Oh yes, we can also plant trees in Alba areas.
Hillary Clinton: This game isn’t over. We are talking about the future of the Earth. we need to reduce greenhouse gases. Bill and I recommended a 60% reduction in gas conservation. We are also going to painting the White House and call it the Green House. Bill suggested putting nude pictures of women on the White House case but I rejected that idea.
Joe Biden: This is getting more ridiculous by the moment. In the greenhouse gas statute we must have the gases methane methane and nitrous gas must be reduced. In addition, we need to eliminate the stench coming from the White House.
Mike Gravel: We need to maintain our health. They also accuse President Bush and Vice President Dick Cheney.
Dennis Kucinich: Droughts, floods, storms, pestilence, disease. We need a war on Global Warming.
Otherwise our planet will die forever. Also, please vote for me. I have special links to outer space that will help us get out of our environmental predicament.
Interviewer: Well, that’s all we have time for today. Stay tuned in our next addition to get to know your Candidates. We promise to raise the next temperature in our segment. They are a subscriber to WKBS. Say, can someone get me a glass of water. I’m sweating buckets.